The Poor and the Stupid

This week my mind has really been turned to the poor and the stupid. The poor being my neighbors who literally don’t have roofs–and there are a lot of them.

And the stupid being me.

We ate at a friend’s house, who made us a delicious dinner and cute frozen yogurt desserts that were dipped in chocolate.

Her kitchen is covered by a patio roof that they one day want to enclose, so they don’t have to walk outside to their bathroom, which has a roof, but the patio roof runs out before it reaches that area. And maybe they don’t want to be outside while they cook, but I kind of liked that. The two bedrooms have roofs and face the patio kitchen.

And honestly, they don’t need more. No one really needs more. You can live happily with roofs over your bedrooms and a bathroom across the patio. Your kitchen just needs a patio roof, and that’s it. (You will have to run through the rain to get to the bathroom, but there’s an umbrella.)

They have everything you really need, plus some luxuries like running water, a gas stove, and mattresses.

As I looked around their second bedroom/dining area/living room, it made me feel really stupid for thinking I needed to buy baby stuff for my baby. Why did I think I needed those things? Like, I needed a rocking chair and a baby swing, didn’t you?

There are a ton of families with little ones in Guanajuato, and I’ve seen 3 baby carriers in the last 6 weeks and hundreds of parents carrying small babies. They just carry babies in their arms.

I have nothing against baby carriers. I just needed a high end one to help my baby’s head not get too flat. I don’t know if it worked. His head is probably misshaped forever.

I feel stupid for thinking the best one would solve the problem. Like I seriously needed to buy the nicest one immediately after leaving the doctor’s office after he told me to try not to put down Nolan too often or his head would bulge on one side. (And I had a baby carrier at home that I just didn’t like for newborns.)

I feel stupid for simply wanting a designer to put my home together when some people just want more of a roof.

I feel stupid for worrying about which pillows would match better; which bedsheet I should switch to make the room brighter; and my cooking utensils I replaced for things to match; and more.

I know I’ve had really good moments, like when I donated allllll of my clothes and shoes to women in Romania; save 1 suit case. And my family would know that’s boxes and boxes of clothes. Or when we gave away all of our household items to couples starting out.

But I feel like, I fell into a trap of believing I need so many things I don’t have, which in turn fed a spirit of ingratitude that looks stupid next to a home without a roof. I’ve always had a home with a roof. And I’m stupid for thinking I need more and for not fully appreciating what I have because it’s not complete, coordinated, nor magazine worthy.

And. Yes. I still want a pretty home. But I don’t need it. I don’t feel without. I don’t feel like I’m missing something in my life that I’ve seen in a pretty Instagram photo. I’m truly grateful for where I am.

By the way, my husband always looked at me like I was an idiot when I needed something. I would tell him that he didn’t understand. He didn’t get it.

But I just didn’t get it.

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